By Al Thompson, TCICWF Promoter and 26-time TCICWF World Champion Well, this here website finally got around to asking yours truly, Al Thompson, about goddamn movies. Now I don't claim to be a big movie buff or nothing, but Jesus Christ I do know one thing--I know what I like. And what I like is damn good goddamn films! So I had to go down to the library and fire up one of their Jesus computers and type up this bloody thing. It took me 7 hours, so you better goddamn well enjoy it! My favorite film of all time is the same as lot of other people that I know, then again how can you blame us? You guessed it, Smokey and the Bandit. If you've been living under a rock and ain't seen it, it's about these two truckers, see? Cletus and Bandit. Bandit was played by Burt Reynolds, by the way, back when men were men and had moustaches, goddammit! And so did some women, too. Anyways, Cletus and Bandit have to pick up a truckload of beer from Texas and get it back to Georgia in 28 hours. Everything goes great until Bandit picks up the runaway bride Carrie (what did I tell you about that goddamn Burt Reynolds?), the future daughter in law of Sheriff Buford T. Justice! And Jesus Christ, it all ends up in a goddamn crazy, interstate highspeed pursuit! If it were up to me, I would of dropped off Carrie, called up my old pal Georgie and spent 28 hours drinking all of that beer, but maybe that's just me and Georgie. I could tell you some goddamn stories, that's for sure. Anyways, the movie is a classic and hell of a lot of fun. My second movie is also a goddamn classic! It stars Clint Eastwood, in his greatest film ever, and I bet you already know which one that I am talking about. That's right--Every Which Way But Loose. Clint plays this easygoing trucker, who is a great fist fighter, Philio Beddoe. If my daughter, Wendy, had been a boy, she would of been named Philio, but she's a girl. And Jesus Christ I still love her just as much goddammit she's just like one of the boys anyway¦she hangs out with them enough! Anyways, back to the movie. Philio travels around with his two buddies, Orville and Clyde, looking for fights, country music, and cold beer. I tell ya it's like the goddamn American Dream. I think me and old Georgie woulda fit right in riding shotgun with Philio, who needs Orville and Clyde? Anyways, Orville is his buddy, who books fights for Philio to win, and Clyde--get this--Clyde is a goddamn orangutan! So I guess we do need Clyde. I mean Georgie is a hairy son of a bitch, but he ain't no orangutan! Georgie's got these short little arms, see, but Clyde bein' a monkey and all, has real long arms. Anyways, Philio won Clyde in a bet and kept him as his buddy! Don't worry, this ain't no Mr. Smith goes to the country bar or nothing. No siree! Clyde is terrific! That hairy orange bastard damn near steals the whole movie! That goddamn orangutan can act! Philio spends the film chasing around this little country singer, drinking beer, and being chased by bikers. The whole film is a goddamn hoot and will have you clapping, cheering, and yelling all the way through. My third favorite film in the whole wide world is called Any Which Way You Can and it is the sequel to Every Which Way But Loose. Clint is back as Philio, Orville is back as Orville, and Clyde is back as the monkey. Once again, it is a hell of a lot of fun. All the way through the film, Clyde had me in fits of laughter. I tell ya, for my money if you ever need to add some entertainment value, you just gotta throw a goddamn monkey into the mix! We actually tried that once in the TCICWF, but things didn't go so well. That mangy bastard of a monkey bit Wee Willie Wonder (he was the midget champ at the time) on the arm, and Willie had to go and get rabies shots! Not to mention the goddamn animal rights protesters and the fact that I had to figure out a way to get the midget title back from a goddamn monkey! But that's a whole 'nother story. Jesus Christ, take it from me folks, wrestling and monkeys just don't mix. Anyways, in the movie, this time Philio takes part in a bare-knuckle fight to get some extra money. I can tell ya that yours truly has been in that situation once or twice, so I know where Philio was coming from me and Georgie have had a few scrapes down at the pub through the years. Anyways, Philio tries to retire from fighting, but then the mob and bikers step in and I don't want to ruin the rest of the movie for you in case you ain't seen it, but I can promise you that it is another goddamn hoot. And that Jesus monkey pretty much steals the show again! It makes me wonder what ol' Clyde is up to these days probably off livin' the good life somewheres. Well, there you go, folks. Those are my three favorite films of all time. If you haven't seen them, go check them out. You can probably find 'em in the discount bin at the video store, unless I've rented them again! Al Thompson